Understanding Overdemandingness in Parenting: Signs, Effects, and How to Change

Overdemandingness refers to a situation where the parent or caregiver consistently requests too much of the child, either emotionally or in terms of behavior, without providing enough support or understanding. This can lead to feelings of frustration, anxiety, and burnout for the child, and can undermine their ability to develop healthy coping strategies and self-regulation skills.

Some common signs of overdemandingness include:

1. Consistently pushing the child to excel or achieve beyond their capabilities.
2. Expecting the child to be responsible for managing adult-level responsibilities or emotions.
3. Not providing enough support or resources to help the child meet expectations.
4. Being overly critical or punitive when the child fails to meet expectations.
5. Ignoring the child's needs and boundaries in favor of one's own desires or agenda.
6. Using guilt, manipulation, or coercion to get the child to comply with requests.
7. Failing to recognize or validate the child's feelings or experiences.
8. Consistently prioritizing one's own needs and desires over the child's well-being.

It is important to note that some parents may be unaware of their own overdemandingness, and may need support and guidance to recognize and change these patterns.